I am sooooo ready to have this baby! The last couple weeks of pregnancy are rough. The waiting game is really tough... but the closer I get, the more uncomfortable I get, and that is the worst part by far. I don't want to complain too much... but its getting hard to think of much else other then just how uncomfortable I am getting.
My ankle is really hurting bad from all this baby weight. I am okay first thing in the morning, but after a while I am limping around. And ofcourse the waddling. That is pretty much a full time thing now.
I can't bend over to pick up anything anymore. Wiping my vajayjay after I pee can be a challenge. Sometimes are more difficult then others, depending on the positioning of the baby at the time.
I love taking showers, they relax my body and make me feel so good, but I dread the end, after I turn off the water and exit. Getting out of the shower and drying myself off without falling over or passing out is not an easy task. I am usually so exhausted by the time I complete my shower and after shower activities, that I have to lay down and relax to catch my breath and center myself.
My pelvic area is what is bothering me the most. There is so much pressure on it right now from the baby moving down, it almost feels like its pulling and ripping apart. Sharp pains are constantly shooting up it. Rolling from one side to another while I am in bed has become so painful, I wonder if I am literally about to tear my pelvic area in half. Sitting in the chair at work makes it so much worse. I left work early yesterday and will be leaving early today too. I just can't handle sitting at my desk for too long.
I planned on working right up until the baby is born. After talking to my boss, I am now working on a day-to-day basis. I pretty much come in in the morning and hang in there as long as I can. Once I get too uncomfortable, I head home.
Then there is the utter exhaustion. In my first trimester, I was like a zombie. I couldn't even think straight and I was always in a fog. Now atleast, I have my wits about me. I am able to think clearly, but I am just too tired physically to do much of anything. I am so glad I already completed everything that I wanted to, so now I can just try to relax and wait for her to get here.
Enough complaining, really I just wanted to put it out there and now I will shut up about it. Like I keep telling myself, she will be here any day and all of this will be worth it!
I would also like to acknowledge my husband. He has been absolutely amazing. He has been helping to keep things cleaned up, doing the dishes, and helping out alot with dinner. He has actually been making most of the dinners, and I will help out a little. But aside from his help around the house, the emotional support he has been giving me is what has really been helping me out the most. He's like my own personal pep squad. He still tells me how beautiful I look and how I am the cutest pregnant girl he has ever seen. I don't really believe him, but it still makes me feel good when he says it. He tells me what a good job I am doing "growing the baby" and how amazing I am. He tells me a hundred times a day how much he loves me and how excited he is about the start of our little family.
He has been completely involved in "baby preparation" as well. He has read some of the books I have picked up. We have been watching a childbirth video, instead of taking the class at the hospital, and its really cute when he brings up things from the video and points them out as they come up in our pregnancy. He is taking his role as "coach" very seriously... which is good cuz I am really going to need his support with no epidural!
It amazes me that not that long ago, we were having such a hard time connecting and how different things felt. Our relationship is in such a different place now. At the time, it felt so dramatic, and it seemed so far from where I wanted us (needed us) to be. As I look back, I realize it was just a wrinkle in time, one we would have no problem smoothing out, as we both had the love and desire necessary. But it is not a place I want to re-visit, and I am going to try really hard to make sure I do my best to keep us from going there again.
It really goes to show you how you must nurture and tend to your relationship, never take things for granted and always consider the other person's feelings and how you are affecting them. No matter how strong you think your bond is, no matter how deep your connection feels, you can't forget to tell your partner and let them know that you still feel the same way. No matter what you may be going through, you have to remember that you are part of a team and that the other person still needs you. I had forgotten that for a minute, and our relationship suffered. Joe reminded me. I am so grateful that he did, and that we were able to get things back on track so quickly. I can't imagine how different and how much harder things would be right now, without him here by my side, getting through this together.
So I am ready. We are ready. We are so ready to meet this little baby and share our lives with her. Any day now... any day!!